


Burnout

by Burgie



Category: Star Stable Online
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-27
Updated: 2018-12-28
Packaged: 2019-09-28 20:30:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17189885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Burgie/pseuds/Burgie
Summary: As D-day approaches, Daine starts training harder. Daine belongs to HellishSam and Astor belongs to SpaceUnicornDot.





	1. Burnout

**Author's Note:**

  * For [HellishSam](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HellishSam/gifts).



The flicker of flame at this time of year was... unusual, at least when it was coming from one of the people most susceptible to the cold. Usually during winter, Daine’s fire abilities were pretty much non-existent. And it wasn't even a Pandorian thing, to be affected by the cold weather like this, Daine knew that because he'd asked his fiance. Ydris felt fine, he'd said, better than ever, in fact. He'd asked Jay, too, the one Pandorian who Daine could turn to when his anxiety wouldn't let him talk to the love of his life, and Jay had reported that he didn't feel any different. Just cold, because it didn't really get cold in Pandoria. So it was just another side-effect of being a freak with fire abilities, then. Great.

Astor, the self-assigned gay uncle (and mentor) of the group, though, didn't seem to find anything unusual in Daine's recent resurgence of magic.

"I'd say it's because you know what's coming soon," said Astor when Daine voiced his confusion, staring at the purple flame wreathing his hand.

"Be more specific," said Daine, frowning at him. "What's coming soon?"

"Why, saving Anne, of course," said Astor, as though it were obvious. Which, yeah, it was, but...

"I'm also getting married at some point," said Daine, pointing to his necklace. The purple crystal still glowed warmly with Ydris' essence, sometimes he swore he could feel it wrapping around his heart, calming him, keeping him steady. It was probably the reason he was feeling so weirdly calm about this, honestly.

"Ah, yes, marriage," said Astor, grinning. "I know all about that, of course. Marriage is a wonderful thing..." Daine snapped his fingers in front of Astor's face, almost close enough to singe his eyebrows off.

"Focus," said Daine. "So my powers are stronger because I'm going to rescue Anne soon. Well, we are." Because it would be a group mission, especially after the disaster that had happened last time. Only now, Daine was nervous for more than just one reason- any of his friends, the Keepers of the Light, could get hurt in there, any one of them might not come home, and they all had so much to live for now.

"Yes, precisely," said Astor, nodding. "Your powers are stronger due to your own anxiety about this upcoming very important mission."

"Perfect to train with, then," said Daine. He backed up a few steps, taking on a fighting stance. "Show me what you've got." His teeth gleamed in the firelight as he grinned, and opposite him, on the stone platform that Astor had created for these training sessions, Astor began to create targets for Daine to hit with his fire. Just simple wooden targets at first, though they would advance to dummies and moving targets later on. Ordinarily, Daine would have tried to pace himself, wanting to hone his attacks. But now... the day was looming ever closer with every sunrise, the druids had done fuck-all to train them (as usual, they'd been lost until Astor had shown up one day not long after Evergray had arrived), and Daine's anxiety overwhelmed him. As a result, yes, his attacks did hit his targets with brutal accuracy, sending flaming wood and fabric falling to the stone beneath, but Daine poured too much energy into each attack.

He didn't notice the sweat pouring down his face, didn't notice the chill setting into his bones thanks to the heat leaving his body in his flame, didn't notice how his limbs trembled. All he could focus on was hitting the next target.

"Daine, I think that's enough," said Astor, eyes wide as he banished the illusory targets.

"No," Daine growled, gritting his teeth. "I need to train more, I need to be ready, I can't lose to Garnok, not again." His eyes were blazing with emotion, but Astor was one of the few individuals who didn't seem to give a crap about that. He'd seen plenty of weird shit in his time, after all, what was a Pandorian hybrid among all that?

"You need to rest," said Astor. "Burning yourself out won't do you any good."

"I can't rest in a battle," said Daine. He bared his teeth at Astor, though Astor didn't flinch or back away, only continued staring at him sadly. Daine growled, throwing his hands up as he turned and began to walk away, back towards where he had Cloud parked a safe distance away from the training arena. "You're fucking useless."

Ydris sensed his phoenix approaching before he saw him, the sensation of warmth travelling ever closer. He no longer had the tether, had ridden himself of it long ago, but he could always feel Daine's presence. It comforted him, especially when he was working at the circus, as he was now. He looked up as Daine approached, Cloud looking like a dapple grey Lusitano. By the thunderous look on Daine's face, Ydris knew that it wasn't good news. Especially when Cloud piaffed back a few steps after Daine dismounted.

"My phoenix?" Ydris asked, walking over from his wagon. Daine had his teeth gritted together, looking as angry as he had when Ydris had first met him years ago.

"Astor won't train with me anymore today," said Daine. "So I need you to." Ydris wanted to refuse, wanted to point out that Astor had been right to stop training. Daine looked haggard, his curly black hair stuck to his face with sweat, a flush on his face that wasn't healthy in the slightest. His eyes burned with intensity, not the sunset colour but rather the full-blown yellow sclera and purple irises with cat-eye pupils. He hadn't manifested anything else, probably because of the cold, but it still worried Ydris.

"Very well, my phoenix," said Ydris. He walked over to the big top, stopping only to inform Xin that the circus would be closing early today and to turn away any visitors. He stopped short of erecting a forcefield, though. Daine might see that as overkill.

"Come on," said Daine, already standing in centre ring. He'd taken his usual hooded sweatshirt off and was now shivering, though he didn't seem to feel it. Ydris momentarily considered dismissing the snow, but not yet. The snow would be good to cool off, he guessed.

"How shall we train, my phoenix?" Ydris asked, taking up a position a good distance away from his fiance. He held up a hand already glowing with Pandorian light. "Moving targets? perhaps some shadow seekers? Or... tentacles?" Briefly, he remembered another time when Daine had come here requesting tentacles, but he quickly squashed that thought. Now was not the time for thinking about sex.

"Garnok," said Daine, and Ydris curled his lip distastefully at the name. However, he summoned tentacles, ones so like Garnok that it was almost like that awful day with the clock all over again. Thinking of that day never failed to fill him with guilt and regret. He'd deserved to be burned, deserved worse, even.

It did, however, fill Ydris with great delight to see Daine flinging fireballs at the tentacles, sending them writhing back a few times before a few more hits and lashes of flame sent them crumpling to the ground. Daine grinned, eyes still blazing, and turned his attention on the next tentacle.

Once again, Daine was so focused on defeating his enemy that he ignored his body. He ignored the sweat, ignored the shivering, the trembling, ignored how weak he was beginning to feel. No, he couldn't be weak. Not again. He wouldn't be easy prey for that monster, wouldn't let his wings be plucked off like that again, wouldn't just stand by and watch his friends die. He had to be strong in order to defeat Garnok, had to just keep pushing. Harder and harder and-

The world greyed suddenly as Daine lunged forward to fling a tongue of flame towards a tentacle that was arching over Ydris. Daine couldn't seem to regain his footing, his foot sliding in the snow, and suddenly, he was lying face-down in the snow. It was cool down here, though he shivered.

"Daniel, my phoenix, please, wake up," Ydris was suddenly pleading, cupping Daine's face in his hands. Daine was on his back now, staring up at what would have been the roof of the tent had Ydris' head not been in the way. Everything was so... bright.

"No," said Daine, and squeezed his eyes shut, willing the world to stop spinning. Closing his eyes only made it worse, though. Daine tried taking deep breaths, figuring that it was just an anxiety attack. He was no stranger to them. He'd been too weak, and he'd fainted, and he couldn't do that when Garnok was there, couldn't pass out when his friends, when Anne, needed him. But at least he hadn't frozen up at the sight of the tentacles like last time. That was progress, right?

"Daniel, please, rest," said Ydris, trying to prevent Daine from getting to his feet. But Daine pushed him away and stood on unsteady feet, swaying slightly.

"I told you, I'm fine," said Daine, glaring at him. He hadn't told Ydris that. Or had he? It didn't matter, he just needed to keep practicing, needed to give until there was nothing left. And he still had something left to give, felt it as he sparked a fire in his palm. "Give me more tentacles to hit."

And, though Ydris felt as though a light breeze would be enough to knock Daine off his feet, he complied, knowing that Daine would only find someone else if he didn't. Someone who wouldn't care so much if Daine did burn himself out doing this.

"I should probably practice with my wings, huh?" said Daine. He concentrated, but his body didn't change. Didn't even try to change. He held his hands out in front of himself, trembling. "Why can't I change?"

"I would wager that you have used too much magic," said Ydris. "Only your pyrokinesis remains."

"Right," said Daine. "Alright, I can manage that. Give me more things to hit." He grinned, though his face was already pale. Shockingly so. Ydris gestured towards the tentacles now flailing behind him and stepped to the side, prepared to teleport in an instant the second Daine reached burnout. Which would be any second now, the rate at which he was going.

Daine knew that something was wrong when he felt as though he'd taken an icy dip again. His fire suddenly just... stopped. He stared at his hands, breath coming in sharp pants at the lack of heat. He looked at Ydris, whose face read a mixture of guilt and concern.

This time, Daine didn't collapse into the snow. Instead, he felt Ydris' arms around him as he fell, giving him a meagre amount of warmth as he faded into that blackness.

"Oh, my darling phoenix, why must you insist on treating yourself so?" Ydris murmured as he got to his feet, holding Daine in his arms. Though his fiance was lanky and tall to boot (and all muscle), Ydris still managed to hold him easily as he teleported to their home on South Hoof. Once there, he immediately carried Daine to their bedroom, pulled back the covers on their bed, and tucked Daine under them, complete with extra blankets. He even cast a spell to warm the bed, needing his fiance to warm up after what had just happened. Daine was shivering so much, even in his unconscious state, that his teeth chattered together.

And, though the bed was far too warm now, Ydris removed his boots and climbed into bed with Daine, wrapping his arms around his fiance and remembering how Daine could so easily warm him on cold winter nights. He pressed his body close to Daine's, kissing the side of his head, his cheeks, his forehead. Daine was still ice-cold to the touch.

Perhaps falling for a mortal had been foolish, but Ydris didn’t care. Besides, Daine was no mortal. And yet... he could still become ill. Still injure himself, even if only on a magical level. Ydris had never burned himself out, but he'd seen it happen to others. First, the cessation of magical abilities, followed quickly by loss of consciousness and side-effects dependent on the kind of magic that had been burned out. For someone like Daine, especially in winter, that was the sheer chill that Daine was currently suffering from. He'd also no doubt be dehydrated when he awoke.

Holding Daine, Ydris only wished that he could warm Daine as easily as Daine could warm him. But all he could do was hold Daine and warm him with his own body heat, and be there for him when he awoke. To deal with whatever the aftermath would be, and to hopefully find some way to lessen Daine's concerns over returning to Pandoria. But Ydris would be lying if he said that he didn't share Daine's same concerns. He could not lose his phoenix to that monster. That was simply unacceptable.


	2. Recovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ydris cares for his fever-addled fiance and tries to get to the heart of the issue.

One moment, Daine was freezing. The next, he felt as though he'd been wreathed in flames, being burned alive, just like what he'd tried to do to Ydris months ago. He cried out, clutching at the sheets, fingers weakly gripping the fabric but unable to do much more before his trembling caused them to fall away.

"Daine!" Ydris' voice seemed to be coming from so far away, sounding muffled to Daine's ears. But he saw his fiance above him, looking worried. Felt a too-cool hand touch his face. Daine tried to speak but his throat was too dry, his tongue seemed stuck in his mouth. Another shiver wracked his body, though he couldn't do much more than feebly try to pull the covers closer around him. And yet, at the same time, his hair was stuck to his face with sweat.

The next thing Daine knew, Ydris' arms were around him, bundling him up in the covers that were wrapped around him like some bizarre burrito, and there was a cold glass being pressed to his lips.

"Wait, perhaps a straw would be better," said Ydris, but Daine was already grabbing the glass as best he could in his shaky hand. More water poured down his neck than landed in his mouth, but the feeling of it was refreshing. He closed his eyes, trying to breathe deeply. This time when he tried to speak, words came out, though his voice was raspy.

"What happened?" Daine asked, peering at his fiance through bleary eyes. Ydris frowned, sitting down beside Daine and placing his hand atop Daine's too-warm one.

"You burned yourself out, my phoenix," said Ydris, trying to keep his voice gentle. But Daine's eyes widened as he gasped, shivering from more than just the cold as he looked down at his hands. He tried to concentrate, clenching his teeth, but no flame came to his hands. There was no flame left, just like Ydris had said. Burned out. Just in time for the mission to rescue Anne. Yeah, nice going.

"No," Daine rasped, struggling with the covers again as he tried to get out of bed. "No, no, I can't be burned out, not now." His shaking legs wouldn't hold him up and he sagged forward, knees buckling. Ydris caught him in his arms, hushing him gently.

"Daniel, please, you need to rest," said Ydris, trying to push Daine back into the bed. His fiance was feverish, he knew because Daine's fevers were hot enough to burn. But he tried not to let on just how much Daine was burning him. Just as he tried to forget the last time that Daine had burned him, when he'd meant to do that.

"Fix me," said Daine, looking at Ydris with golden eyes that couldn't even turn that sunset colour. There was no magic left in him, not a single drop.

"Only rest can fix magical burnout, my phoenix," said Ydris. Daine bared his teeth, a gesture that looked almost stupid in his non-magical state.

"I don't have time to rest," said Daine. "I need to fight." Ydris closed his eyes for a moment, hoping that Daine would forgive him for this.

"You need rest, my phoenix, whether you like it or not," said Ydris. And, pressing his palm to Daine's hot forehead, Ydris rendered his fiance unconscious, tucking the man back into bed.

The next time Daine woke up, it was to the sensation of being lifted out of bed. The covers around him were gone, making his shivers more violent as he wrapped his arms tightly around the person holding him. Ydris sucked in air sharply through his teeth as Daine's too-hot arms came into contact with his bare neck.

Immediately, Daine tried to pull away, eyes wide with alarm, tears already forming in his eyes.

"I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have burned you, please, I didn't mean it," said Daine, his voice sounding almost whiny. In his mind's eye, in the delirium from his fever, Daine could see the flames licking at Ydris' fine clothing, could see the angry red burn marks appearing on his skin. Could smell the burning flesh, the burning fabric. He tried to struggle away from Ydris, not wanting to burn him further, wanting to throw himself into a pool of water and extinguish his flames for good. Why was Ydris still with him, anyway, after he'd burned him so much, after he'd hurt him so much?

Ydris closed his eyes, trying to fight the urge to hold Daine closer to him and comfort him. Daine was clearly delirious and distressed, remembering that day in the tent as clearly as Ydris did.

"You need to cool off, Daine," said Ydris, opening his eyes again and trying to fight back the need to comfort as he saw the distraught expression in Daine's eyes. He wanted to comfort his fiance, of course, but Daine really did need to cool off before he burned up completely. And Ydris couldn't really cool him off if he was sitting in bed comforting Daine. Besides, there was an ice bath waiting for him.

"No, you need to cool off," Daine muttered. Ydris sighed, moving his hands so that he had a tighter grip on Daine in his arms.

Daine was half asleep by the time that Daine reached the bathroom, where the tub of ice water awaited him. Little ice cubes floated in it, and, though Daine still shivered and his arms rippled with gooseflesh, Ydris knew that the bath would only be good for him. It had worked every time Daine had a cold in the past, after all, with the fever that burned.

"Daine, I'm going to put you in the ice water now," said Ydris. "It's okay, it won't hurt you, it's just to bring your body temperature back down so you don't start cooking yourself alive."

"Like I cooked you alive," said Daine, pinning his fiance with a look of such heartbreak that Ydris had to take a deep breath to steady himself.

"You stopped yourself, remember?" said Ydris.

"Yeah, but I still did it," said Daine. He wasn't looking at the tub, so Ydris began to lower him down towards the water. Maybe Daine would struggle less if he didn't see it coming.

"You were upset, and I completely understand why," said Ydris. "I deserved it."

"No, you didn't," said Daine, tears slipping down his cheeks. "Nobody deserves tha-" He broke off in a scream as Ydris' trembling arms finally dropped Daine into the water, which began to hiss. Ordinarily, Daine would have hissed too. But this time, panic overtook his features as he began to thrash around, screaming, trying to struggle up despite Ydris trying to hold him down.

"I'm so sorry, my phoenix," said Ydris, tears slipping down his cheeks at the terror written on Daine's features, at how his struggles weakened despite his best efforts to grip tightly to Ydris, to anything he could reach, trying to climb out of the water.

"No, not again, please, I'm sorry!" Daine yelled, his fingernails leaving small crescents in Ydris' hands. "I'm so sorry, please don't drown me, please don't make me go back there, I take it back, just please." His breath hitched as he looked up at Ydris. "I don't wanna drown again."

At those words, Ydris' heart stopped. He could barely find the words.

"What?" said Ydris, his voice barely there. Daine continued, either hearing him or deciding to continue anyway.

"It was so cold, and Cloud went in, and I went in, and Cole appeared and-" Daine took a deep, shuddering breath, though he stayed in the still-steaming water. The ice had melted by now, but the hands that clung so tightly to Ydris' were cooler now. The ice water was doing its job. "I died, Ydris." Daine's teeth chattered, though Ydris suspected that it was from more than just the chilly water. "That's why I first started seeing you, from the fucking nightmares from that." Ydris had never before seen his fiance so vulnerable, not even after the worst panic attack. Not even when he'd awoken in his wagon after Ydris had rescued him from Garnok's clutches.

"Had I known, my phoenix, I would have warned you," Ydris whispered, his voice tight with emotion. He felt horrible, now, for causing Daine such panic, such terror, for making him relive that awful experience. "Daniel, I am so, so sorry, please forgive me." He pulled Daine up out of the water, wrapping his arms around his fiance's sodden torso as they knelt on either side of the tub, Daine inside and Ydris outside. Daine twisted himself around to face Ydris, still shivering, though his eyes seemed clearer now.

"I've died but I'm still scared of death, and I'm just terrified of Garnok getting me or my friends," said Daine, shivering. "Does that make me a coward?"

"If that makes you a coward, then I am a coward too," said Ydris, pressing a kiss to Daine's forehead. It was cooler now, mercifully, only the heat of a regular human fever now. "I fear death as much as anyone. It is a rational fear to have."

"Never thought you'd be scared of anything," said Daine. He looked more like himself now, despite the tears streaking down his face.

"I fear many things," said Ydris. "That monster. Losing my circus of dreams. Losing you."

"Me?" said Daine, eyes widening. Ydris nodded, and Daine's heart skipped a beat.

"My phoenix, I love you with all of my heart," said Ydris. "Though it took me far too long and far too much heartache to accept it and embrace it."

"And to learn how to show it properly," said Daine.

"Yes," said Ydris, recalling the tether that had come out of love but almost destroyed them. "But if you would allow me to, I believe that I have a solution that may ease both our minds." He held his hand out. "I will need your crystal for a moment." Daine looked down at the purple crystal that hung around his neck. Now that the intense heat had faded from his body, he could feel the warm, pulsing glow of it again. He took it off, though, holding it out to Ydris with the leather cord wrapped around the crystal.

"What do you need it for?" Daine asked. His neck felt empty without it.

"Something very important," said Ydris. He took the crystal in his hand, though he tried not to get too caught up in the mere existence of it. He swore that a flame glimmered inside of it, which wasn't unusual. Their wedding would be the final twining together of their souls, the crystal was merely a preparation for that.

As he held the crystal tightly in his fist, Ydris willed spells into it, spells of protection, of added strength, added power, allowing Daine a little of his own magic reserves should Daine's own magic falter. And finally, the strong sense of Ydris being there, of courage, of willingness to continue even in the face of adversity. In short, everything that Daine would need to give him courage for this important mission.

"Here you are, my phoenix," said Ydris, opening eyes that still glowed dimly from the magic use. He handed the crystal back to Daine, but then, seeing how much Daine's hands still trembled, held it out over Daine's head.

"What'd you do to it?" Daine asked as Ydris lowered the necklace down over Daine's bowed head.

"I put spells of protection in it," said Ydris as he placed the necklace once more around Daine’s neck, cupping the crystal in his palm against Daine’s chest. "So that, the next time you come face to tentacle with that monster, you will be ready to fight without fearing for your own wellbeing. He will not be able to lay a single scale on you without this crystal putting up a forcefield around you. But your spells will be able to pass through it, your fire, your lightning."

In that moment, Daine felt more loved than he had before. And, in the brief few moments that he had clarity thanks to the cold water cooling his mind, he threw his arms around his fiance, pressing his face into Ydris' chest. He could feel the crystal radiating out warmth and courage and protection through him as tears slid down his face again.

"Thank you," said Daine, looking up at Ydris for a moment before burying himself in his fiance once more. "I love you."

"I love you too, my phoenix," said Ydris, stroking his hand down Daine's back. "My heart. That is why I need you to rest, recover your strength, and only train sensibly until the final battle. Because when Garnok rises before you, none of us want you to falter."

"I know," said Daine, closing his eyes. "That's what I'm afraid of." Ydris only kissed him on the lips, just once, before drawing away to leave Daine in the water.

"Please be careful," said Ydris. "And don't worry, I'll stay nearby just in case the delirium kicks in again and makes you believe that you are drowning in that frozen lake."

"I'll explain it all to you later," said Daine. "Sorry it came out that way, I just... I hoped I could forget about it if I just didn't mention it."

"I understand," said Ydris. "Admitting weakness is very difficult."

"I've noticed," said Daine. He lay back in the bath, the clarity from the cold (and possibly from the crystal) allowing him to relax and allow the cold water to seep away the burning heat. "Get me some more water while I'm lucid?"

"That is a most excellent idea, my phoenix," said Ydris, and left the room. While he was gone, Daine held his crystal in his hand again, grinning at it freely as he only allowed himself to do where nobody else could see. Tears spilled down his cheeks again at the thought of what Ydris had done to it. His fiance loved him, enough to enchant his engagement crystal with spells that would keep him safe for this next very important mission. The thought soothed Daine's anxiety over it better than anything else. Though he would still train hard, just as soon as his magic had been replenished.


End file.
